Wednesday, April 27, 2011

woosh woosh

The week has just sped by. I can't believe my last post was on Monday and tomorrow it'll be Friday. Time just seems to woosh by without me really noticing.

Yesterday I had my first fasting day in a long time. It was great! If I didn't have the stress of having to find an excuse to get out of meals, I would have enjoyed it a whole lot more than I did. But it was nice to just fast for once and now count calories.

I find not eating at all a whole lot easier than counting out 300cal or however many I'm having that day. That's how lazy I am.

I'm looking forward to doing a good fast sometime soon. I love how the first day is hunger, then after a while there isn't any more hunger, but a bit of dizziness. Then by day 4 or 5 that passes too and that's when I feel great. Like, I can feel the weight coming off. I haven't done a week long liquid fast for a while. I think in the next 2 weeks I need to get used to fasting again so when I do my 2 week long liquid fast I'll be okay. As long as I don't pass out I don't really care.

I'm procrastinating on here right now. I have to face my boss tomorrow morning at 9.30am and I have to present him with work that I was supposed to do over the past 3 months but didn't. So. Somehow tonight, over the next 16 hours I have to pull 3 months worth of work out of my ass. So. So. So. I guess it's pretty safe to assume that I won't be sleeping tonight. I hope that I'll at least look tired tomorrow so that when he does yell at me, he won't yell at me for long.

I'm trying to make myself as organised as possible and to try to get as much of a handle on this paper as I can, but it's not easy since the last time I really knew was literally 3 months ago. I always fall on my face around Prof CNM so it's almost like, trying to circumvent the inevitable.

I saw him yesterday. I was really just saying hello, but we ended up talking about the project and he is PISSED OFF. It's taking too long, the numbers just aren't right and I can provide no explanation for why they are not. I'm scared he'll kick me off the paper. I'm scared he'll trash the paper and it won't be published. I'm scared about a lot of things. But I have to face it. Lucky for me I'm going out with friends after that and we plan to have a bitchy therapy session. And I'll need it.

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